Well, this is it. I know I didn't make my goal of under 7 for my A1c this time. But, tomorrow is another day. I know this one is my responsibility. Been dragging the tush as far as exercise goes, and my dietary choices have been hit and miss.
I don't want to beat myself up this time. I just want to keep moving forward.
I found a service that will come into your home to draw bloods...they only charge $40 for the whole shabang, and guarantee your doctor will have the results in 5 business days. That's service, I tell you. I WAS going to a private lab that is a 20 minute drive away, and paying $65 for the same tests. So this is an awesome deal.
I am not sure what to expect results-wise, but my appointment with the endo isn't for 2 weeks, so I won't know until then. It'll be OK, no matter what, because I WILL do better.
Sunday, January 30, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Arm-Flapping Low
The worst kind. The low that gets my arm jerking up uncontrollably, that has my eyes feeling like they're rolling back in my head...I don't know, maybe they do.
I go from feeling sorta woozy, and maybe low, to suddenly, oh yeah this is low, and not good. Pouring juice before the meter even confirms it, because I KNOW it now. My arm is starting to move of its' own volition.
And of course, with this comes panic.
I am alone treating this low, family out and not coming home tonight. Flashes of the last time this happened start to torment me, I couldn't see at all that time. That time, I couldn't hear, speak or see. I just sat and let my convulsing arm shove glucose tabs at my face and hope they hit my mouth. But Luc was with me that time. I try to prep myself, just in case I lose my vision and maybe my lucidity.
My bottle of Dex4 is in my lap. My meter is there, and I have more juice ready. For some weird reason, I shove popcorn into the microwave.
Alone on the couch, I sit and eat popcorn, already too full from supper to be able to handle more food. Because of course that's when this happens. I am full of food-I just took too much insulin.
I stop eating the popcorn. It's making me sick.
You'd think I would have grabbed the phone to have it near me....
The sweat hits. I feel so out of control. I can't walk properly at this point. I am not even sure why I am trying, but my mind keeps saying there's something to do in the kitchen.
Finally, I start to feel it-the slow creep of a rising blood sugar. A bit of calm, rational thought returning. I know I am going to pay for downing those 9, 10, 11? Dex4 tabs, way too many carbs. My blood sugar will be sky high later. But that's ok. Because I was alone, and I made it.
I go from feeling sorta woozy, and maybe low, to suddenly, oh yeah this is low, and not good. Pouring juice before the meter even confirms it, because I KNOW it now. My arm is starting to move of its' own volition.
And of course, with this comes panic.
I am alone treating this low, family out and not coming home tonight. Flashes of the last time this happened start to torment me, I couldn't see at all that time. That time, I couldn't hear, speak or see. I just sat and let my convulsing arm shove glucose tabs at my face and hope they hit my mouth. But Luc was with me that time. I try to prep myself, just in case I lose my vision and maybe my lucidity.
My bottle of Dex4 is in my lap. My meter is there, and I have more juice ready. For some weird reason, I shove popcorn into the microwave.
Alone on the couch, I sit and eat popcorn, already too full from supper to be able to handle more food. Because of course that's when this happens. I am full of food-I just took too much insulin.
I stop eating the popcorn. It's making me sick.
You'd think I would have grabbed the phone to have it near me....
The sweat hits. I feel so out of control. I can't walk properly at this point. I am not even sure why I am trying, but my mind keeps saying there's something to do in the kitchen.
Finally, I start to feel it-the slow creep of a rising blood sugar. A bit of calm, rational thought returning. I know I am going to pay for downing those 9, 10, 11? Dex4 tabs, way too many carbs. My blood sugar will be sky high later. But that's ok. Because I was alone, and I made it.
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Spaghetti Squash
In an ongoing effort to lower the old carb intake, we tried spaghetti squash the other night. I have to be honest, I wasn't expecting much.
I cut it half length-wise, sprayed it with olive oil, threw on some salt, pepper and mixed italian spices (basil and oregano, mostly) and shoved it onto a baking sheet at 350 for 45 minutes.
Meanwhile, I cooked up some ground beef and added a jar of our fave pasta sauce, which simmered on the stove while the squash baked.
Pull it out of the oven, shred it up with a fork, put it on a plate and top with the meat sauce. It was good. A little crunchier than pasta, and sweeter. Carbs are lower, though, so even though it tasted sweet, it isn't really.
It was really good! I think I like it better than spaghetti. Why did they not tell me about this 25 years ago when I was diagnosed?? Here's your insulin, and oh by the way, here's your first spaghetti squash-on us. You'll love it.
I cut it half length-wise, sprayed it with olive oil, threw on some salt, pepper and mixed italian spices (basil and oregano, mostly) and shoved it onto a baking sheet at 350 for 45 minutes.
Meanwhile, I cooked up some ground beef and added a jar of our fave pasta sauce, which simmered on the stove while the squash baked.
Pull it out of the oven, shred it up with a fork, put it on a plate and top with the meat sauce. It was good. A little crunchier than pasta, and sweeter. Carbs are lower, though, so even though it tasted sweet, it isn't really.
It was really good! I think I like it better than spaghetti. Why did they not tell me about this 25 years ago when I was diagnosed?? Here's your insulin, and oh by the way, here's your first spaghetti squash-on us. You'll love it.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Pre-emptive Fear
So what's with getting nervous about maybe getting a low before it even happens? Am I the only one this happens to? I doubt it. We all have so much in common, I am sure someone out there knows what I am talking about.
Last night, as the family sat down to watch a movie (Dinner For Schmucks-which wasn't bad), I started going over my carb count for supper in my head. And comparing it to how much insulin I had taken. And wondering if I had added the right amount to include the popcorn I was eating. And getting REAALLLY a little too possessive of said popcorn as I thought maybe I took too much insulin. Then I got that little niggly feeling in my gut, let's just call it panic, that usually sets in when I am going into a situation fearing a low and not knowing how I'll cope with it (like being in line at Disneyworld for Splash Mountain or actually in a movie theatre). But I was at home. Feeling the same panic. When I knew we could just pause the old movie and deal with it, then move on.
I ate all the popcorn, and everything was fine. But the anxiety was there.
I think it's always there...or close.
And guess what? Anxiety raises blood glucose. Ah, the irony.
Last night, as the family sat down to watch a movie (Dinner For Schmucks-which wasn't bad), I started going over my carb count for supper in my head. And comparing it to how much insulin I had taken. And wondering if I had added the right amount to include the popcorn I was eating. And getting REAALLLY a little too possessive of said popcorn as I thought maybe I took too much insulin. Then I got that little niggly feeling in my gut, let's just call it panic, that usually sets in when I am going into a situation fearing a low and not knowing how I'll cope with it (like being in line at Disneyworld for Splash Mountain or actually in a movie theatre). But I was at home. Feeling the same panic. When I knew we could just pause the old movie and deal with it, then move on.
I ate all the popcorn, and everything was fine. But the anxiety was there.
I think it's always there...or close.
And guess what? Anxiety raises blood glucose. Ah, the irony.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
And Just Like That...
Last post I was saying I wanted to run faster, and that my best time for running 5K was just under 45 minutes.
And just like that, today I did it in 37:50. And I wasn't even feeling 100%, I have a cold or something.
Let's not say it was easy, though. I pushed myself, hard. My heart rate was up to 177, then I would slow down a bit until I could breathe again. For the last 5 minutes of my running I could seeI might get it in under 40 minutes, so I kept going. At the end, I was wiped out and breathing hard, but it was AWESOME!
Let's talk about how that kind of run looks for me, as a type I diabetic.
I started out at 17 mmol/l (306mg/l). I know, too high technically to run-but I knew I was going to drop because my insulin was peaking.
After 20 minutes, I was at 10.6 (190). What's fun about testing while you're running is the heart pounding really lets your blood flow freely...all over your hand, and (I noticed when I was done) the walls....ewwwww.
By the end of the session, I was at 4.9 (88). I felt really lightheaded, and woozy, so I had 2 Dex4's and a glass of milk.
I think the only thing I would have changed about the whole thing, is I would rather have juice at the end of the run...the Dex4's were so hard to get down. I would love to find a gelpak that didn't have caffeine in it. I am supposed to limit my caffeine intake, and the one time I DID use a runner's gelpak, I felt awful afterward. They're loaded with caffeine to give people the boost they need while running. I don't want a boost, just carbs, you know?
I could get all caught up with wishing that I could just jump on the treadmill and run without worrying about all this...cause man, that would rock, but in the end I'm still doing it!!
And just like that, today I did it in 37:50. And I wasn't even feeling 100%, I have a cold or something.
Let's not say it was easy, though. I pushed myself, hard. My heart rate was up to 177, then I would slow down a bit until I could breathe again. For the last 5 minutes of my running I could seeI might get it in under 40 minutes, so I kept going. At the end, I was wiped out and breathing hard, but it was AWESOME!
Let's talk about how that kind of run looks for me, as a type I diabetic.
I started out at 17 mmol/l (306mg/l). I know, too high technically to run-but I knew I was going to drop because my insulin was peaking.
After 20 minutes, I was at 10.6 (190). What's fun about testing while you're running is the heart pounding really lets your blood flow freely...all over your hand, and (I noticed when I was done) the walls....ewwwww.
By the end of the session, I was at 4.9 (88). I felt really lightheaded, and woozy, so I had 2 Dex4's and a glass of milk.
I think the only thing I would have changed about the whole thing, is I would rather have juice at the end of the run...the Dex4's were so hard to get down. I would love to find a gelpak that didn't have caffeine in it. I am supposed to limit my caffeine intake, and the one time I DID use a runner's gelpak, I felt awful afterward. They're loaded with caffeine to give people the boost they need while running. I don't want a boost, just carbs, you know?
I could get all caught up with wishing that I could just jump on the treadmill and run without worrying about all this...cause man, that would rock, but in the end I'm still doing it!!
Monday, January 3, 2011
Happy Discovery
I mentioned a couple of posts back (see here) that I have been running. Not the first time I try to take it up, but this is the longest it has stuck. I ran 5K for the first time September 5, 2010. When I started in June, I couldn't run solid for 1.5K. So, some improvement, and I was aware of it. I was proud of myself.
Lately I have been feeling that I am not fast enough. I know I am not fast, I run at my own pace, and for me it is as fast as I can manage. But I looked at my time for the 5K I ran in September, and it was 51 minutes. Now, I can do it in under 45. That's an improvement, I do believe!
I want to run it in under 30. I can't do it today, but I will do it one day. Seeing the minutes that dropped in the last months remind me that even if it's a long road, it's shorter every day.
Me, my glucose tabs, my meter and the somewhat shorter, long road. Here's to us!
Lately I have been feeling that I am not fast enough. I know I am not fast, I run at my own pace, and for me it is as fast as I can manage. But I looked at my time for the 5K I ran in September, and it was 51 minutes. Now, I can do it in under 45. That's an improvement, I do believe!
I want to run it in under 30. I can't do it today, but I will do it one day. Seeing the minutes that dropped in the last months remind me that even if it's a long road, it's shorter every day.
Me, my glucose tabs, my meter and the somewhat shorter, long road. Here's to us!
Sunday, January 2, 2011
Resolutions-I Choose to Choose
It's a new year and the time when all good people swear they're going to be better people. We all want to be better than we are, which is why, after some consideration, I have decided that resolutions are good things.
It's a good thing to challenge yourself to be the best you can be.
It's a good thing to think about how you can live a better life.
It's a good thing to reflect on how you can be in charge of what happens to you.
The problem arises when you pick unrealistic resolutions...when you choose not to be the best you that you can be, but someone else entirely.
No one can do that.
So I choose to choose. That's all. I choose to think about the things I do, and be mindful of how they will affect me; body, mind, and spirit. I don't think you can go wrong with that.
Happy New Year.
It's a good thing to challenge yourself to be the best you can be.
It's a good thing to think about how you can live a better life.
It's a good thing to reflect on how you can be in charge of what happens to you.
The problem arises when you pick unrealistic resolutions...when you choose not to be the best you that you can be, but someone else entirely.
No one can do that.
So I choose to choose. That's all. I choose to think about the things I do, and be mindful of how they will affect me; body, mind, and spirit. I don't think you can go wrong with that.
Happy New Year.
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